Published in Channel Kindness.
The psych ward is often seen as a place of despair—a dark, scary space where people go when things feel impossible. But for me, it became something more: a place of unexpected connection, kindness, and healing. This is not a story about a perfect recovery or easy answers.
Rather, it’s a story about finding sparks of light in the shadows, and discovering that even in the darkest moments, there is hope to be found. These twenty lessons are snippets of what I learned in the psych ward—lessons about happiness, connection, kindness, and healing. I hope that these tidbits can offer comfort and courage to anyone who needs it.
Happiness: You know that you’ve found happiness when…
Lesson 1: You start looking forward to things again, even if those things center around your release and touching grass for the first time post-admission.
Lesson 2: You realize that the issues that brought you to the psych ward are not insurmountable mountains to climb, but rather things that can be overcome once you have the right support in place.
Lesson 3: Something on the psych ward schedule sparks your interest. It could be something as little as sitting out on the terrace for fresh air.
Lesson 4: You can hold your own in a conversation with another patient, and you actually find it relatively interesting.
Lesson 5: You actually look forward to free time on the unit because it means that you can color, or journal, or talk to another patient that you’ve formed a bond with.
Connection: You know that you’ve experienced connection when…
Lesson 6: Your mom calls you every day, multiple times a day, and tells you not to be embarrassed when you have to hang up the phone and run to your room because the hospital is in a code green.
Lesson 7: You stay up late talking to your roommate about things other than your psych ward stay.
Lesson 8: You find a spark of enjoyment in hanging out with the girl across the hall in the common area. You both have strong support systems and find comfort in talking about your family, friends, and all the people you miss on the outside.
Lesson 9: Your psychiatrist is on vacation in Arizona and she still calls the hospital twice a day trying to figure out what is going on and what the plan is for your medications.
Lesson 10: Barb Solish, your mentor at NAMI who you deeply admire, gives you her cell phone number. She goes above and beyond. She tells you that she’s rooting for you and that you did a really hard thing by seeking inpatient treatment.
Kindness: You know that you’ve been shown kindness…
Lesson 11: When another patient talks to you for an entire hour about how TMS saved their life. You’re not eligible for TMS due to a neurological condition, but appreciate their honesty and authenticity.
Lesson 12: When the charge nurse comes to speak to you about your medications and talks to you as an equal, recognizing your mental health education that you’ve gained through your role as a NAMI Next Gen Mental Health Advisor.
Lesson 13: When another patient hands you the salt and pepper packets they’ve saved because they’re being discharged today and think that you could use them.
Lesson 14: When another patient and a nurse recognize you from NAMI’s Hope Starts With Us Podcast, and make it a point to tell you that it resonated with them. Because even in the darkest of times, you’ve made an impact.
Lesson 15: When the attending physician thinks that you’re ready for discharge, and doesn’t merely hand you your discharge papers, but takes a minute to talk about all of the progress that you’ve made during your stay.
Healing: You know that you’re on your way to healing…
Lesson 16: When you wake up and are excited for the day ahead, that’s when you know you’ve turned the corner.
Lesson 17: When group therapy and quiet time and medication time are not things to endure but things to conquer.
Lesson 18: When you are looking forward to your first outside shower, your first sleep in your own bed with your stuffed acorn, and your first home cooked meal.
Lesson 19: When you believe in yourself and your life again.
Lesson 20: When you text your best friend for the first time post admission and discuss which Smithsonian Museum you are going to go to, you don’t think about your depression or anxiety at all.
Surviving the psych ward doesn’t mean that your struggle with mental illness is over. It does mean that you’ve faced a mountain and kept climbing, even when the path was steep and dark at times. These lessons that I’ve learned aren’t just about the time I spent inside those walls. They are about carrying the light I’ve found forward, into every day after discharge. Healing isn’t a destination, but a journey; marked by small victories, kindness, and the fortitude to keep moving onward. If you’re reading this and feeling lost or overwhelmed, know this: you are not alone, and there is hope waiting for you on the other side.
Hope Lives Here 